and still beauty.

[mylittleredgirl]

Today was a lot. So very good, but so very much.

Some of it I can't talk about yet -- I'm in a rare place for me where I need to be alone with a choice, to make myself okay with where I am and where I am or am not going before I can face the world like that.

And because the exercise of joy sadhana is to find joy in everything:

The past few days have made this clear to me: I would rather be a Red Sox fan in a series like this than not be a Red Sox fan. Never give up, never back down. Keep the Faith.

5 good things about today:

1. Beauty everywhere. I don't know what happened, because my emotional walls were so worn down by my unexpected Life Processing before work, by lack of sleep, by break in illness, but I could feel everything. Sense perception at an all-time high. Colours are bright and beautiful, music intricate, the cold outside felt so good on my skin. I felt alive and awake in my body, like I have been wrapped up in cotton for so long I learned to move with it and was just cut free.

2. Ran into *two* people by coincidence, beloved friends from YEARS ago that I never thought I would see again. They both look great, and called me glowing.

3. Best. Dinner. EVER. Oh my God. Liza gave me a dinner break and it was seriously the Kripalu dinner I have been dreaming about since last summer (which is sad that I dream about dinners at work, but it's THAT GOOD). Oh my God, olive bread. I FREAKED OUT with gleee in the dining chapel and scared people.

4. Woke up to planning mini!OTP community with kataclysmic!! Livejournal thwarted her attempts to make it pretty while I was at work (grr) but you should go and join the emptyblankcommunity now and be wowed later when it shapes up and we announce it proper: miniotp

5. Got a call from victorycabbage. I am going to see Kappas tomorrow!!

3 things I did well:

1. Made it through most of unplanned paternal Life Intervention (I love my family, and wow are we ever Kripalu nutjobs) good and collected.

2. Remembered to bring iThor to work to copy CDs for Liza.

3. Kicked serious retail ass at work.

And. What in the hell?

Sam Carter's broken toaster is for sale.

I really thought besyd made that up as a funny because of that toaster fic I wrote...

Health willing, I am hopefully off to Providence tomorrow (!!!). Um. Hang out with me?

-- Little Red, who sends lots of love as only she can in the dazed, hippie zone she is in today.

p.s. Er... I am actually unspoiled for upcoming... everything... so if Sam's busted-ass toaster is, like, a pivotal plot point in an episode yet to be aired, don't tell me. And if it's a pivotal plot point in an episode that has already aired, please DO tell me, because that's something I need to know. And if besyd somehow engineered this after all, please tell me that too.

Comments

[meg-tdj.livejournal.com]

Beauty everywhere. I don't know what happened, because my emotional walls were so worn down by my unexpected Life Processing before work, by lack of sleep, by break in illness, but I could feel everything. Sense perception at an all-time high. Colours are bright and beautiful, music intricate, the cold outside felt so good on my skin. I felt alive and awake in my body, like I have been wrapped up in cotton for so long I learned to move with it and was just cut free.

That's a wonderful feeling, isn't it? Like getting a gift after all that hardship. ((((huggles)))) :)

[mylittleredgirl.livejournal.com]

YES. OH MY GOD. People thought I was on drugs, though, because I was literally fangirling fabrics in the store (all "LOOK at this colour! And feel it!") and having emotional experiences about how good the food was ;)

[wisdomeagle]

And if it's a pivotal plot point in an episode that has already aired, please DO tell me, because that's something I need to know.

"Ascension", S5, Orlin used it to make Sam, um, something shiny? He also broke her microwave. It was cute. Unless you already knew that, and wanted to know if it was important elsewhere? Yeah.

And I cannot imagine not being a Red Sox fan, this series or any other. Faith. So much faith.

[mylittleredgirl.livejournal.com]

OHHHH! I didn't know the toaster was ever *seen*, just discussed. Toaster! Yay!

And oh my God. I will miss this so much over the long winter. *gleees*

SO MUCH FAITH. And love of the game. AND HOPE. And just... *pride*

Mostly asleep and STILL I BELIEVE!

[elly427.livejournal.com]

*hugs you*

[mylittleredgirl.livejournal.com]

*hugs back*

I am a bad bad human being who has not yet sent you your Atlantis tape because I haven't finished copying it. BAD HUMAN! *slaps hand* I will send you the tape I copied MONTHS AGO and then copy the last few episodes on another, maybe?

[nenya_kanadka]

*glomps you* *sniffles a bit at LR's story about today*

That's awesome.

(And they're nuts if they say you're nuts for lusting after fabric & a good meal--you're just being a good Hobbit, that's all! "If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.")

[mylittleredgirl.livejournal.com]

*laughs* maybe I WILL have to read Lord of the Rings after all, if I am Hobbit-y!!

[nenya_kanadka]

OH, SWEET VICTORY!

Yes, you really should. Or The Hobbit, which is shorter and easier on the brain. And will sucker you right in.

Hobbits are great. All normal and down-to-earth in the middle of all these high and mighty adventures. Good POV for the reader--plus, they're the heroes! :D

[mylittleredgirl.livejournal.com]

I read "The Hobbit" once, actually. Or I tried to. I was Gandalf (wheee!) in a middle-school play (and got an awesome staff that gave off insanely bright flashes of light from a Nickelodeon toy). I couldn't get through the book, though. People told me that I could still try reading Lord of the Rings but I am yet to really feel drawn to it... (I don't read much right now anyway -- maybe when I get un-sick?)

I have never been all that into fantasy, despite my huge love of sci-fi. *shrugs* Not sure why that is.

[nenya_kanadka]

Hey, you don't like it, you don't like it. :D It's got its good points and bad, and 'tis mostly a matter of taste. Even I, who ended up a fan, didn't like things about it (for example, the way the first book drags forever before things start happening, and then the way TOO MUCH stuff happens in the second book).

Then again there are people who didn't like The Hobbit and liked LOTR, or vice versa. So, if you ever *do* feel like reading it, it might be worth another look. But only if you want to.

Plus, you can say you're a Hobbit without having, like, actually read everything the man ever wrote, can't you?

*I'm* a Hobbit. (When I'm not being a Trill.)

Urge to show you the intro to an MST agentrosecotton and I wrote is rising...only she's the Hobbit in that one. :)

[joyfulfeather.livejournal.com]

Colours are bright and beautiful, music intricate, the cold outside felt so good on my skin. I felt alive and awake in my body, like I have been wrapped up in cotton for so long I learned to move with it and was just cut free.

That is probably the best feeling ever. Like a taste of the way things should be, but so rarely are. So glad for you that you're feeling like this!

[mylittleredgirl.livejournal.com]

I love your icon :) A lot. *stares*

It really was such a great feeling. I will have to work on training my brain to provide me with it more often! :)

[joyfulfeather.livejournal.com]

Isn't it gorgeous? Seemed so appropriate, too. ^_^

[nenya_kanadka]

I like the icon, too. I LOVE that screenshot of the gas-giant in the sky! Totally awesome visual representation of awe and wonder to me...

*hugs icon*