PLANET MIRRORBALLUS, WE NEED TO TALK

I watch Dancing With the Stars for one reason: SPRAY-TANNED, BEDAZZLED ESCAPISM from life as I know it hanging precariously by a thread the various overblown dramas in my life, and your part of the deal is that nothing actually bad is supposed to happen on this show.

( When reality stars get hurt, you can't just blame the writers. Also cutespam. )

I DUN BEEN TAGGED.

rosewildeirish tagged me. And when I complained that I had no good answers she said MAKE SOMETHING UP. Thus, meme:

( THE THINGS I DO FOR YOU PEOPLE )

I'm really sorry...

But you guys are just going to have to deal with this until the end of DWTS. Only two weeks left!

( Interview: Hines says they need to practice making out for the finals, sort of. )