oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Feb. 8th, 2005 03:35 pmRemember when I organized those King House parties for 200 people? Now I'm rendered totally shaky and nervous and panicky about throwing a knitting circle this evening. I miss you guys -- Rina and Sheryl and Genna and Justin and Betsy and Kirsten. A LOT. *craves real soc soc with people I don't have to Be On for, for my beloved siblings who know my weaknesses and love me anyway*
I've been trying for two weeks to post an entry about how hard and crazy and emotionally messy everything seems right now, stuff about my health, how I somehow want support but don't know in what form or from whom, but it just takes too much effort to write these things out (especially with the fear of people going "wait, THAT's your problem? Shut the hell up."). It's easier to just type lots of exclamation points, smile at people who smile at me, and not get into a conversation I don't know if I'll have the energy to finish, or if I'll hate myself at the end of it.
( cut to spare the uninterested )
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And, to start the gleee rolling after that:
( things I did well today so far )
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In more flippant news, people are, like, building bomb shelters as though pestilence and war and such will actually RAIN FROM THE SKIES when Stargate airs tonight in the UK. This entertains and frightens me in equal measure.
That said, spoil me for things and there will be wrath. WRATH.
Well, unless pestilence actually *does* rain from the sky, in which case, I'd like to be informed.
I've been trying for two weeks to post an entry about how hard and crazy and emotionally messy everything seems right now, stuff about my health, how I somehow want support but don't know in what form or from whom, but it just takes too much effort to write these things out (especially with the fear of people going "wait, THAT's your problem? Shut the hell up."). It's easier to just type lots of exclamation points, smile at people who smile at me, and not get into a conversation I don't know if I'll have the energy to finish, or if I'll hate myself at the end of it.
( cut to spare the uninterested )
---
And, to start the gleee rolling after that:
( things I did well today so far )
---
In more flippant news, people are, like, building bomb shelters as though pestilence and war and such will actually RAIN FROM THE SKIES when Stargate airs tonight in the UK. This entertains and frightens me in equal measure.
That said, spoil me for things and there will be wrath. WRATH.
Well, unless pestilence actually *does* rain from the sky, in which case, I'd like to be informed.